♾️Part 6: The Infinite Cycle of Chaos (ICC) Diagram
The Infinite Cycle of Chaos (ICC)
The cycle starts with a childhood wound where love was experienced as "conditional." To survive, the child makes a subconscious Vow: "I will never be vulnerable again."
The individual creates a "False Self"—an image of perfection or superiority designed for safety, not vanity.
The most destructive phase. The narcissist projects their internal "conditional" rules onto their partner: "You must validate my False Self. You must not be real. You must not challenge the Armor."
The crash is inevitable because the partner is a human, not a fantasy. To the narcissist, the partner's failure to validate them feels like the "Original Betrayal" happening all over again.
Instead of taking accountability, the narcissist uses the failure as "proof" that people cannot be trusted. This reinforces the Vow, strengthens the Armor, and resets the cycle for the next person.
The Hard Truth
You cannot solve a problem you don't understand. Once you see the diagram, you realize the "chaos" in your life isn't random—it’s programmed. To stop the cycle, you don't just need to "be nicer"; you have to dismantle the Vow that powers the entire engine.